How Star Wars Helped Unite a Father & Daughter – Legends Report
By Sukh Singh, Associate Partner, Lighthouse International
“As good as he was in public, he was even better in private as a husband and father.”
– Stephen M.R. Covey (Stephen R. Covey’s son)
People either love or hate films like Star Wars, and now it’s back, it’s on everyone’s lips. But have you ever experienced how a film, book or TV show, when they are used in wise ways, can inspire entire generations? Bring children’s imaginations to life and even unite families?
The late Dr. Stephen Covey, author of The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, experienced a huge turning point in his relationship with his daughter when she was just a little girl, with a little help from the original Star Wars. Here is his story…
We were planning a private date, which is something I enjoy regularly with each of my children. We find that the anticipation of the date is as satisfying as the realisation. So I approached my daughter and said,
“Honey, tonight’s your night. What do you want to do?”
“Oh Dad, that’s ok,” she replied.
“No, really,” I said. “What would you like to do?”
“Well,” she finally said “what I want to do, you don’t really want to do.”
“Really, honey,” I said earnestly, “I want to do it. No matter what. It’s your choice.”
“I want to go see Star Wars,” she replied. “But I know you don’t like Star Wars. You slept through it before. You don’t like these fantasy movies. That’s okay, Dad.”
“No, honey, if that’s what you’d like to do, I’d like to do it.”
“Dad, don’t worry about it. We don’t always have to have this date.” She paused and then added, “But you know why you don’t like Star Wars? It’s because you don’t understand the philosophy and training of a Jedi Knight.”
“What?”
“You know the things you teach, Dad? Those are the same things that go into the training of a Jedi Knight.”
“Really? Let’s go see Star Wars!”
And we did. She sat next to me and gave me the paradigm. I became her student, her learner. It was totally fascinating. I could begin to see out of a new paradigm the whole way a Jedi Knight’s basic philosophy in training is manifested in different circumstances…It was bonding and very satisfying.
Investing In The Relationships That Matter
I absolutely love this story. Dr. Covey had an absolute commitment to build his relationship with his daughter, and when he listened to her, he actually learned from her. Sometimes we don’t want to open ourselves up to what’s actually important to others because it seems boring or complicated. But when we actually open ourselves up and get into another person’s world, the relationship can blossom like never before. This is the fundamental truth behind this story, that if we want a rich, fulfilling relationship, we need to invest in it with our whole hearts.
Is there a film, activity, book or sport that you could use to bond with someone you care about?
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